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Safe, Sane, Consensual
Sometimes our desire for a relationship or even our desire for
a play partner can cloud our thinking. One's kink should not pose a threat
to safety. Experienced lifestylers talk about relationships that are based
on being safe, sane, and consensual. Here are some definitions for you to
consider, borrowed from
msin10sity.
SAFE: Means no permanent or long-healing injury to the mind
or body of BOTH partners in a D/s relationship. And I do not mean tattoos,
piercings, brandings and/or scarification when done by someone who knows what
they are doing. Emotional abuse can be even more devastating that any physical
injury, and must be carefully guarded against by open communication and honesty.
SANE: Means pretty nearly the same as consensual to me...
That the activities engaged in by both partners are mutually pleasurable and
no one should suffer any lasting injury in mind or body from any of those
activities. The Dominant or Master/Mistress must be in control of him/herself
first, and his/her submissive or slave second.
CONSENSUAL: Means that both parties are in full agreement
to the type of play or relationship they are going to have. The
submissive/slave must be as honest and straightforward about his/her limits
as the Dominant and open communication is absolutely essential for full consensuality.
Nothing should interfere with informed consent and no party should be forced
or coerced into doing things they feel would be hurtful to themselves or their
partner.

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